A Dad's Experience
Dear Community Families:
Immediately after the Festival of Life in Saluzzo, I lived a 2 week "Experience Community" with my son at "Oasis of St. Francis" in Vada, Italy
After all the weeding and hoeing, eating watermelon and weeding and hoeing, I would like to share a thought that continues to stay at in the forefront of a multitude of beautiful memories. It is a real lesson of Community -- a lesson I as a father need to practice in my own life if I want to help my son to live a life of joy rather than die a death of despair.
Our sons and daughters, many of whom never held a Rosary in their hands before entering Community, are now on their knees in front of The Eucharist each day praying for us! They pray every day that we are being watched over by our Father in heaven and that the Holy Spirit is guiding us along the same path that they are sacrificing and struggling so hard to walk. They pray for forgiveness - for strength to continue their sacrifice and carrying of the cross. And then they pray with all they have in their still healing hearts, that we, too, sacrifice and take the walk of Community with them, for them!
I was in my Experience about 3 or 4 days before I actually took part in
the one-on-one after dinner talks, which encompassed a 30 minute walk
around the farm or relaxing on a bench with one other person talking
about what is meaningful. What strikes me as I recollect, is how open,
personal and sincere the words spoken were. A common bond in all of the
talks however, was not only their relationship with their family, but
also their family's relationship to Community!
In these talks, I learned that our children are all the same in how they love their family and how they need to know now that their family not only supports them but that they are living Community at home. The men in Community frequently sacrifice and get up in the middle of the night to pray in front of the Holy Eucharist, not for themselves but for their own - or another's - family member or friend that is struggling in their life outside Community.
Daily, the guys stand up after meals and share their thoughts, commitments, struggles and accomplishments with everyone and at the same time ask the others for help, for prayers, for their family. They talk about how they hope some day to have their father or mother come for an experience. And they mention how special it was to see their Mom, Dad, sisters and brothers at the Festival, or how they are so happy to hear that their parents are living Community. It amazes me how deep and long lasting the effect of our relationship with Community is to our sons and daughters.
So, a lesson I have gained is simple - one that many parents who have walked before me already know. Splitting wood, kicking the soccer ball, eating watermelon, grilling burgers, singing and dancing with our sons and daughters are really only a superficial and selfish activity that makes us feel good, but it will never matter -- unless we first take the walk of prayer and Community with them. Community isn't like taking a cold medicine and once the cold is gone we can stop the medicine and return to our normal routine. Rather, Community is now part of our diet, nutrition our soul will always need in order to live - just as our body will always need nourishment. As fathers and mothers we continue to be an example to our sons and daughters throughout our lives, even as our children have matured, reached their adulthood and now make their own decisions. And once we are no longer of this life, our impact is even stronger as our children reflect on and realize the trueness of our love for them and the example we left behind.
If I want my son to continue his walk in Community, I need to continue always my walk in Community, not just on First Saturdays and not just at Festivals or Retreats, but every day of the week. God will be answering our children's daily prayers to the Holy Spirit, Jesus and Mary. I want to be a part of His answer.