Sister Susan
The two most precious gifts I have received in my life from my parents
are the gift of life and the gift of the faith, and I wish to thank God
and my parents for these blessed gifts.
I grew up in Ireland in a family of seven children, where being part of a big family taught me many practical things about life: communicating with others, sharing, learning to accept myself and others, and so on. I was the fourth child in the family, and from an early age had a timid and quiet character, tending to be nervous and fearful for even small situations. I remember not knowing where I belonged in the family, as the three older children seemed a group within themselves, and the three younger children seemed to have more in common. Iin the family I began to feel isolated, and growing up this caused some problems for me in relationships.
My Young Years
As my father and mother prayed the Rosary with us and taught us prayers, I had the privilege of getting to realize that a relationship with God in prayer was a strength, and as a child often observed my parents who would lead us to pray for certain people in need or intercede for difficult situations. At twelve years of age, when we would go to Sunday Mass together I remember being amazed at the whole ceremony of the Mass, the words of the Priest as he talked in the sermon about the life of Jesus, and the offering of Jesus' Body and Blood to us in the Eucharist.
During my adolescent years I was very confused as I still had not encountered Jesus in a personal way and although in my mind I knew Jesus had died for me, in my heart I had not as yet met him. At the age of 19, I had a nervous break-down, and was prescribed medical drugs to help me get better. My mum and dad, sisters, brothers and friends were very supportive to me, and always encouraged me every step of the journey. I started attending a prayer group, and here thanks be to God and to my sister who was part of this group, I began to change as a person, with a new hope for living in my heart. Tthis change was gradual and I believe that the encounter with Jesus in the prayer was the reason for a more positive outlook to life.
Medjugorje
In 1995, I joined part of an Irish group of young people on a pilgrimage to Medugorje where I experienced peace and received inner healing through our prayer as a group and also personal prayer. I received the grace to believe that Jesus is truly present in the Blessed Sacrament, and I experienced the tender love of Our Lady, as our mother. I encountered the Cenacle Community for the first time at the house of Field of Life, where the testimony of two men touched my heart. Their smiles were so true. I, too, desired this trueness with myself and everyone.
Encountering the Community
After a series of different courses and jobs within the space of ten years, I was offered to accompany a fellow Irish girl to Italy to do an experience in the Cenacle Community. I said yes and sensed in my heart it was the right decision. After two months of learning more about myself in the company of other men/women in the fraternity house , I returned home to Ireland as my father was seriously ill. Thank God he survived the illness, and one year later I wrote to Sister Elvira to ask permission to continue the experience in Community. My parents and family were not initially happy about my decision. Through prayer I knew within me it was the right path. My desire was to do God's will and I had a great joy in my heart to have the opportunity to return to the Community once again. Sister Elvira's idea of living in truth with myself fascinated me. Although I understood my family's sadness at not seeing me often, I said yes to what was in my heart.
In the Community house where I re-entered, the girls (from all over the world) helped me to become true to myself in challenging me to change certain ways of thinking and acting that were false. This did not make me happy. I had formed an image of myself that was not true, and slowly day by day through prayer, work and spending free time together I discovered the real sense of life and liberty within to be the person I am today. The prayer was a strength and a stability for me to latch onto through the ups and downs of the healing process. Three times weekly we were blessed to receive the Holy Mass and confession by various priests who accompanied us on our journey. In every house in the Community there is a Chapel and the Blessed Sacrament. Here is the fount of life and healing. I discovered that the prayer is ongoing, even outside the Chapel in the love and truth of the words and gestures of the girls who accepted me as I am.
The Desire of My Heart
While in the Community two years, I had the privilege of going to open the girls' house at Ade, Lourdes, in August, 2002, with eleven other girls. I had a desire to discover what my path in life was for me. Much of my life I had desired to marry a good man and have a big family. I thought this was the path. However, when I searched deep in my heart, I had a strong love for Jesus and a burning desire to serve Him. When I wrote to Sister Elvira to tell her, she invited me to come and experience the way of life at the house of formation for the sisters/brothers in the Community. I had a joy and a peace in my heart, and the sense of being in the right place lasted, like a circle that fits very well in a round hole. I am here now 17 months. The everyday routine of 3 rosaries recited, daily Mass, reflection on the Word of God, and Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament, along with the guidance of Mother Elvira and Spiritual Directors, sharing our lives together in the daily duties and free time where we dance, sing, and play in simplicity make me very happy. In our life here, we try to live the Gospel.
My greatest desire is to do the will of God in the ordinary events of everyday life, as Sister Elvira has taught me. Before I thought that the great events were exciting and life-giving. Now I see that in doing the ordinary tasks of everyday with love I am fulfilled as a woman and Consecrated Sister. I thank God for the gift of serving Him in the Consecrated life. Thank God for Sister Elvira, Father Stefano, and all the men, women, and children of the Community who say yes everyday to God's will. I would like to thank Our Lady for the way she has always guided me in my life and brought me home where I belong in the Cenacle Community.
God's Word
These words from the Bible, the prophet Jeremiah often consoled me when I was searching for my vocation. I wish to share them with you: "'Yes, I know the plans I have in mind for you,' Yahweh declares, 'plans for peace, not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. When you call to me and come and pray to me, I shall listen to you. When you search for me, you will find me; when you search wholeheartedly for me, I shall let you find me.' (Yahweh declares, 'I shall restore your fortunes and gather you in from all the nations and wherever I have driven you.' Yahweh declares, 'I shall bring you back to the place from which I exiled you.')"